黒子のバスケ FAN DISC ～光射す場所へ～
Kuroko no Basuke FAN DISC ~Hikari Sasu Basho He~ /
“~To the Place Where the Light Shines~”
Original Mini Drama: “Oshaberi demo Shimasen Ka” /
“Why Don’t We Chat?”
Kagami: (A fan disc…?! I’m having some serious déjà vu here…)
[timestamp; translation notes]
You can watch the mini drama online here. Thanks to angela for the link and to Mochi for the HQ version.
Employee: Welcome to Maji Burger!
Kagami: Um… I’ll have a large cola and…ten cheeseburgers, please.
Kise: Ten?! Kagamicchi, you’re kidding, right?
Kuroko: He’s right, Kagami-kun. There’s no way ten will be enough for you.
Kise: What? That’s not what I—
Kagami: It’ll take too long if I order them all at once, so I thought I could just get seconds later.
Kise: How much are you planning to eat?!
Aomine: Hey, Kise, if you’re done ordering, then get out of the way.
Momoi: Dai-chan, will you put in my order with yours?
Aomine: Yeah. Make sure you pay me back later.
Momoi: I will.
Takao: Hey, over here!
Kuroko: Hello, Takao-kun.
Kise: You guys got here really early!
Midorima: You’ve got some nerve to be late to the meeting that you called, Kuroko.
Kuroko: We’re right on time, actually… When did you get here?
Takao: About fifteen minutes ago, maybe? Shin-chan was super excited about getting to see you guys. I’m all worn out ‘cause he kept making me pedal faster!
Midorima: That’s a lie, and you know it, Takao! You dragged me here against my will!
Takao: Oh, really?
Aomine: Spill it, Tetsu. What are we doing here? And what’s with this lineup, anyway?
Kuroko: Thank you for coming, everyone. Now, I’d like to—
Kise: Alright, streetball it is! That’s the only reason you’d get all of us together, right?
Takao: [in background] Sounds fun!
Kuroko: [in background] No, that’s not—
Kise: [in background] I can’t wait!
Takao: [in background] How should we divide the teams?
Aomine: Streetball? Yeah, we’ve got the right number of people for some three-on-three.
Momoi: I’ll be the referee!
Aomine: [in background; to Momoi] Sure, you could be the ref, but why don’t you play once in a while?
Momoi: [in background; to Aomine] What?
Kuroko: Kagami-kun, I need your help.
Kagami: Huh? Oh, right. Hey, guys, hold on a sec. Kuroko’s got something to say.
Midorima: Get on with it and tell us why you asked us here.
Kuroko: Let me start from the beginning, then. Why don’t we have a chat?
Aomine: What’d you say?
Takao: Chat? What do you mean?
Midorima: This makes no sense.
Kise: Um, Kurokocchi, did you really get us together just so we could chat?
Kuroko: Yes. Since this is a fan disc, I want to do something we can’t do in the main story.
Aomine: A “fan disc”? What’s that?
Kagami: (A fan disc…?! I’m having some serious déjà vu here…)
Kagami: Hey, Kuroko… Please don’t tell me you want to do that again.
Kuroko: I don’t want to—I’m going to, Kagami-kun. Since this is a fan disc, we can do whatever we like.
Kagami: Where did you get that idea?!
Kuroko: Now that we’re all on the same page, I’d like us to reminisce about the Winter Cup.
Takao: Doesn’t sound like we have much of a choice.
Midorima: I can’t say I’m pleased with this turn of events, but it would be a waste of time for us to dwell on it any further.
Takao: True enough. And it’s not like we get the chance to chat with these guys every day. This could be fun!
[Title: Why Don’t We Chat?]
Kuroko: Let’s begin with the decisive game of the Winter Cup preliminaries—Seirin’s game against Midorima-kun and Shuutoku High School.
Kuroko: This time, instead of being the up-and-coming challengers, we were defending our title—
Midorima: There was never any chance we would lose to you a second time.
Kagami: Hey, Midorima, don’t break his plane of thought.
Takao: “Plane of thought”?! Don’t you mean “train of thought”?
Momoi: I watched this game from the stands with Ki-chan. The game ended in a tie, but both teams fought so hard that it really could have gone either way.
Kise: I was so surprised when Midorimacchi made that pass!
Kagami: To tell you the truth, I couldn’t believe it, either.
Kuroko: It surprised me, too.
Takao: Me, too! Me, too!
Kagami: Wait, you’re his partner! You should’ve seen that coming!
Takao: Nah, I’m serious. What I mean is, as Shin-chan’s teammates, that pass was pretty special for us, too.
Midorima: I believed it was necessary in order to win. Nothing more.
Takao: [imitating Midorima] I will…pass you the ball…na no da yo.
Midorima: Takao! Cut it out!
Kiyoshi: Oh, you guys are here, too? It sure sounds like you’re having a good time.
Kagami: Kiyoshi-senpai?! Captain? Izuki-senpai?
Kuroko: Thank you for all you did today.
Hyuuga: What’s with that lineup?! C’mon, let’s get out of here.
Izuki: Huh? But Hyuuga, you’re the one who said you wanted to stop by Maji Burger to get something to eat.
Hyuuga: That group is a headache just waiting to happen! I don’t want to get involved!
Kuroko: Captain, you’re leaving already?
Hyuuga: —whoa, Kuroko, where’d you come from?!
Kuroko: I greeted you when you first came in.
Kiyoshi: I didn’t see you, either. Sorry about that.
Kuroko: That’s okay. I’m used to it. By the way, senpai…would you like to chat?
Hyuuga, Izuki, and Kiyoshi: Huh?
Kagami: Um, well, since this is a fan disc, he wants to do something we can’t do in the main story…sir.
Izuki: Oh… That sounds strangely familiar…
Hyuuga: That’s funny… Same here…
Kiyoshi: That’s right! I remember Riko saying the same thing. So you guys are at it again?
Kuroko: Perfect timing. We were just about to reminisce about our game against Kirisaki Daiichi.
Hyuuga: Do we have to?!
Aomine: Wait, who’s the blond dude?
Kise: He’s wearing Seirin’s uniform. Does he really go to your school?
Momoi: That’s obviously Hyuuga-san.
Aomine and Kise: What?
Kise: Wait, now that you mention it—! How did you know, Momocchi?
Momoi: His hairstyle is the only thing that’s different.
Takao: Izuki-san and Kiyoshi-san look pretty much the same…just a little younger, maybe?
Midorima: This video must be from last year.
Hyuuga: Hey, Kuroko! Stop the tape!
Kuroko: I mixed up the tapes.
Hyuuga: I bet you did it on purpose.
Kuroko: Of course not.
Kagami: Hey, let’s move on, Kuroko. This was when we played Kirisaki Daiichi in the finals league of the Winter Cup preliminaries.
Kise: I-I remember these guys! They played rough the whole game, but the referee never called any fouls!
Hyuuga: That’s because they did it out of the ref’s line of sight.
Izuki: I hate to admit it, but Hanamiya is a master at analyzing situations and directing his teammates on the court.
Kise: Then why doesn’t he quit playing dirty and just play basketball, fair and square?!
Kiyoshi: You’ve got a point, but that’s just not how he operates.
Kise: What? I don’t get it!
Kagami: There’s no way we’d understand how that asshole thinks.
Kuroko: I was afraid you were going to retaliate with your fists, Kagami-kun.
Kiyoshi: You really hung in there, Kagami.
Hyuuga: I could say the same to you, dumbass. You were acting all tough, shielding us from all those blows by yourself.
Kuroko: I appreciate you protecting us, but please don’t push yourself too hard.
Kiyoshi: I’m sorry for making you worry. But this game made me realize that you guys always have my back, too. Thank you.
Takao: Huh? What’s up, Shin-chan?
Midorima: I’m going to the washroom.
Takao: The bathroom? Oh, I guess I’ll go, too. I can order some more food while I’m up.
Izuki: Midorima, Takao! Don’t fall asleep in the restroom!
Midorima and Takao: Um, okay.
Kuroko: Up next is the first game of the Winter Cup—our game against Touou Academy.
Momoi: Dai-chan, it’s finally our turn! Come on, pay attention! We’re reminiscing about our game against Seirin!
Aomine: What’s the point? It won’t change what happened.
Momoi: There are more important things than the final score!
Aomine: I don’t even remember what happened during the game.
Momoi: Oh, is that right?
Aomine: What’s that supposed to mean?
Momoi: Tetsu-kun, now’s your chance!
Kuroko: The Touou game was our chance to get revenge for the Inter-High game last summer.
Izuki: I never would’ve thought we’d face them in the first round, though.
Kagami: Yeah, but that meant I could focus completely on going head-to-head with Aomine.
Momoi: You know, once Dai-chan found out we’d be playing Tetsu-kun’s team, he started taking practice a lot more seriously.
Aomine: Hey! Nobody asked you, Satsuki!
Momoi: If you don’t remember, you don’t get a say.
Hyuuga: We never intended to lose, of course, but I couldn’t help being impressed by Touou as a team.
Izuki: Imayoshi-san’s strategy for dealing with Kuroko was really unnerving. It felt like he could read our minds.
Hyuuga: Yeah. Knowing Imayoshi-san, I wouldn’t put it past him. Maybe he’s a psychic or something.
Izuki: Does that mean he was playing mind-to-mind defense? Hey, that’s a great one!
Hyuuga: No, it ain’t!
Kiyoshi: A mind-reading basketball player would make for one tricky opponent!
Hyuuga: Don’t encourage him!
Kiyoshi: But Izuki said—
Kise: Aominecchi, Kagamicchi—how did it feel to compete in the Zone?
Aomine: Good question.
Kagami: Actually…I don’t remember much about it, either. All I remember is trying to keep track of Aomine and the ball…
Kuroko: That shows how intensely focused you were on the game.
Momoi: Dai-chan, you looked like you were having a lot of fun out there.
Aomine: Well…I wasn’t bored, at least.
Takao: Shin-chan, you don’t want seconds? Just a drink?
Midorima: This is plenty.
Takao: I got an extra-large order of fries, so feel free to have some.
Izuki: Because small fries are for small fry, right? That’s it!
Midorima: But this is an extra-large.
Hyuuga: Izuki, that’s just sad.
Kiyoshi: Let’s see… If we’re going in order, then our game against Yousen should be up next.
Kuroko: Right, during the quarterfinals of the Winter Cup. Kiyoshi-senpai, what did you think of the game?
Kiyoshi: Huh? Oh, Yousen…? I remember them being really tall.
Hyuuga: All you remember is what they looked like?!
Kagami: Their captain kinda looked like a gorilla.
Hyuuga: You, too?!
Kuroko: Could we concentrate on reminiscing about the game, please?
Momoi: Right! After Yousen’s two straight shutouts, Tetsu-kun scored the first points against them with an incredibly cool shot!
Kuroko: Thank you, Momoi-san. It’s thanks to Aomine-kun that I was able to perfect that shot.
Momoi: Dai-chan, you should have told me you were going to help Tetsu-kun practice! You stood me up for our shopping trip.
Aomine: Tell that to Tetsu! Who in their right mind asks an opponent they just beat the day before to teach them how to shoot?
Kise: That’s Kurokocchi for you! But that new technique was what helped him score the first points against Murasakibaracchi. Oh, I know!
Kise: Since we’re all here, why don’t we give Murasakibaracchi a call?
Kuroko: Right now?
Kuroko: Hello? Murasakibara-kun?
Murasakibara: You hardly ever call me, Kurochin. Do you need something?
Kuroko: A few of us got together to chat about some things… What are you up to, Murasakibara-kun?
Murasakibara: I ran out of snacks, so I was headed out to restock.
Kuroko: It’s unusual for you to wait that long to buy more.
Murasakibara: It’s all Murochin’s fault.
Kuroko: “Murochin”? Oh, you mean Himuro-san?
Kagami: Did something happen with Tatsuya?
Murasakibara: See, he said he’d give me all the sweets they sent him from America. Then this huge cardboard box came for him in the mail, chock full of jellybeans and stuff.
Kise: What’s wrong with jellybeans? I’m pretty fond of them myself.
Murasakibara: If you had five whole bags full of nothing but jellybeans, you’d get sick of them, too.
Kagami: Oh. And since they were from America, I bet the bags were bigger than the ones you get in Japan.
Murasakibara: And there was a piece of weirdly colored, sketchy-looking candy mixed in.
Kuroko: I see… “Sketchy-looking candy”?
Murasakibara: It snuck in with the jellybeans, but it was definitely an imposter!
Kagami: What do you mean, an “imposter”?!
Murasakibara: Murochin said it tasted fine, but when I asked him what flavor it was, he just cocked his head to the side and couldn’t give me an answer. What kind of flavor is that supposed to be?
Midorima: Considering Murasakibara once willingly tried something flavored like orange pollock caramel, it must have been quite bizarre indeed.
Takao: “Orange pollock caramel”? Whoa, that sounds gross.
Aomine: You eat a scary amount of sweets as it is, so that should be right up your alley!
Murasakibara: Ugh, I can’t take it anymore! I wanna eat Maiubou! I wanna eat cookies! I wanna eat potato chips! We’re done talking, right?! I’m hanging up!
Kuroko: It seems that gave him an intense craving for Japanese snacks.
Kagami: Hey, Kuroko. Don’t you think everybody’s probably tired of reminiscing about the games?
Kuroko: I suppose so. Then why don’t we chat about something else?
Kagami: What?! We’re not done yet?!
Kuroko: Well, this is a fan disc. We can do whatever we want.
Kagami: That doesn’t mean we should!
Hyuuga: What’s the matter, Kuroko? Are Coach germs contagious?
Izuki: “Coach germs”? She’s gonna kill you later.
Kiyoshi: I know! If we can talk about whatever we want, why don’t you tell us about Akashi?
Kuroko: About Akashi-kun?
Kiyoshi: We made it all the way to Murasakibara, so doesn’t it make sense to talk about Akashi next? Since this is a fan disc and all.
Kagami: Now he’s got you saying it, Kiyoshi-senpai?!
Kuroko: That’s a good idea.
Kuroko: Please tell us how you spend your days off.
Akashi: I often go horseback riding.
Izuki: What? Horseback riding?
Midorima: On a white horse named Yukimaru.
Kuroko: Among the Generation of Miracles, with whom do you get along best?
Akashi: Shintarou, I suppose. We spent a lot of time together because of our leadership positions on the team, as well.
Takao: Akashi was the captain, and you were the vice-captain, right, Shin-chan?
Kuroko: Conversely, with whom do you not get along?
Akashi: No one. If I had to say, it would be Daiki. Besides his rebellious streak, there are times when we simply do not see eye to eye.
Aomine: There’s no way we’d ever see eye to eye on anything!
Kuroko: What is your favorite memory from middle school?
Akashi: I don’t have a particular favorite, but I did enjoy the time I spent with everyone in the basketball club.
Kise: It makes me happy to hear Akashicchi say that!
Kuroko: What is your favorite thing to do other than play basketball?
Akashi: I often play shogi to relax. It’s something I can enjoy with or without an opponent.
Kiyoshi: Shogi’s all well and good, but you should try hanafuda sometime!
Hyuuga: Nobody asked for your opinion!
Kuroko: What type of girl do you like?
Akashi: I like elegant women.
Momoi: That makes sense.
Kuroko: What does basketball mean to you?
Akashi: It’s a way for me to better myself.
Kuroko: Does that meet with your satisfaction?
Kagami: Who are you talking to?! And what was the deal with that segment just now? That was way more scripted than any of our recaps of the games!
Kagami: I know! You think so, too, right? Whoa, Nigou?! What’re you doing in here?!
Kuroko: You really shouldn’t be in here.
Nigou: Woof! Woof!
Momoi: He really does look just like Tetsu-kun! Come here, little guy! Squeeze!
Hyuuga: Nigou’s gonna suffocate!
Aomine: Satsuki, hand him over! Did you get tired of waiting out there all alone? How about we go play a little one-on-one after this?
Nigou: Woof! Woof! Woof!
Kise: Huh? One-on-one with Aominecchi? I wanna play, too!
Kagami: Count me in, too!
Izuki: That makes Nigou the underdog! Now there’s a joke!
Kiyoshi: Looks like there’s a lot of tail wagging going on over here!
Takao: Shin-chan! The dog peed in the rear car!
Midorima: You dimwitted dog! Aomine, hand him over!
Kuroko: Midorima-kun, please forgive him.
Midorima: Don’t look at me with those identical faces!
At [1:38], there’s some partially audible background chatter about who’s going to be on whose team. Kise mentions Aomine, and, when asked which team he wants to be on, Takao says that he’d like to try passing to someone other than Midorima once in a while. Takao agrees with Aomine when he suggests Momoi should play.
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